Well today is your 68th birthday. I don't know what to say. I am at a loss. I kept busy today doing chores, cleaning out the gazebo so its ready for Mary's baby chicks. Wandered around from here to there doing STUFF and in the end finished a couple of jobs. Drove the tractor out to the back and disconnected the snow blower. Even though they expect snow this weekend I made an executive decision as I don't think we need the blower. I guess I'll be making all the decisions around here now. I am grateful I have Mary to consult with. She can tell me if I am crazy or not.
When I stop and think about you today I do feel deep sadness and loss. I want to hear your voice and see your smile. I want you to tell me how your day went. I want you back! Is this what a wave of sadness is? Do I stay here with these thoughts or push on? I do have to make supper .............. I have fond memories of your 50th birthday and then we went to San Francisco to celebrate it. Seems so long ago but feels like yesterday.
68 is too young to die. Dammit its too young to die.
I think what will sustain me is to follow the approach we used surrounding your last few weeks. I will use the attitude of gratitude and celebrate your life. So with that in mind I will heat up some leftovers for us and find some chocolate for desert. Love you babe..
___________________________________________________
Margaret and Nelson came over about 8:15 to have a birthday drink! They walked in with an angel gift for me and a bottle of rum for you. Can't believe I actually had a couple sips. Yuk I do not like the taste of coke or Pepsi. I have never actually drunk pop throughout my life! We had a great visit, clinking our glasses to you and we told stories. Lovely way to celebrate your birthday.
No comments:
Post a Comment